Taking The Vocal Cords For Granted

I stayed home from work today, not something that I like to do, but considering I can still barely get an intelligible word past my lips from my seemingly destroyed vocal cords, I thought it was fitting. Especially being a musician and singer, it's beyond explainable of how frustrating it is not to be able to sing let alone talk. You never truly realize how important something is to you until you don't have it anymore. That goes for so many things in life, but when it's something that you dream could be your livelihood someday, it makes it even more unbearable.

It's not that I haven't had laryngitis before in my life. I can remember two occasions quite clearly that overtake this one in a heartbeat. The first occasion was during one of the first shows my former band Now Transmission played. Only a few songs into our set my voice completely gave out. Mid song, out came nothing but a high pitched squeal and nothing but silence no matter how hard I tried from then on. It was a pretty embarrassing moment, and luckily I've been able to relive that moment over and over as the performance was being recorded.

The second time was due to sickness rather than strain although it did have an adverse effect on the band as it was only a couple of years later. We had signed up to play a battle of the band in Boston, quite a big deal for us as we didn't travel to the big city very often because it was quite a long trip. My squeaky voice box forced us to switch up the lineup a bit; our bassist moving to vocals, our guitarist playing bass, and me playing guitar. We only played one song, actually made it past the first round (due to a couple of bands not showing up) and played the second round in the same configuration a couple of days later. It wasn't the most successful venture ever, but it definitely could have worked out a whole lot worse.

That brings us today. I'm not in a band anymore, just writing and playing music on my own. But especially now, as I'm trying to write and practice as much as I ever have, not being able to do simple things that I do everyday like practice my new songs in the living room, sing in the car, yell at the guy who cut me off, or talk to my fiance is maddening. I'm sure my voice will probably come back to me in the next few days, it's just moments like these that make me realize how much I take things for granted sometimes. As if I wasn't motivated enough to work on my music before, now, once my throat heals, I want to be busting out the music like my life depended on it. 

Who knows when you could lose that thing you love for good, you have to appreciate it while it's here. Cheesy, of course, but oh so true. Rock on!

It's Finally Time...I'm Going Home

I thought April 22nd seemed like it was ages away but it's almost here. Tomorrow morning (very early tomorrow morning), KJ and I heading to the airport in Kansas City to hitch a flight to Portland, Maine. That's with a connector in Chicago. Once we arrive we're heading straight down to Massachusetts so we can be involved with our roommates wedding in New Hampshire on Friday.

(Wow, I didn't realize how many states this involved until this very minute.)

On Saturday we're driving back up to Maine to spend some time with our fams before heading back to Kansas next Tuesday. It's going to be a hectic and very long week, but it will be worth it. I'm still coughing up a lung and though my sinus congestion is much better, I'm afraid this could be a bit miserable. I'm hoping for the best though and doing all I can to at least get better by Friday.

We still haven't done any packing. That's my job for today. (Here I am procrastinating by writing this message.) I also wanted to clean this place up a bit so we don't come back to a hell hole. My plan is to polish up my guitar and put her to bed for the first time in a long time so she doesn't collect more dust than necessary. I wish I could take her with me but putting her through baggage claim sketches me out something wicked. Plus, I don't think I'd have much opportunity to play. (I'm here close to 24/7 and I've barely touched her lately. Sad.)

Being sick is way more distracting to my personal writing process than I wish it was. I'm easily distracted anyway but when I'm constantly coughing, sneezing, and amazingly frustrated for being sick in the first place, it doesn't bode well for my state of mind or my creativity. (I know excuses, excuses but I'm a finicky artist.)

But anyway, enough procrastinating, I need to get to work. It's going to be a long week my friends. Keep rockin!

Word Box Wednesday or Whiny Wednesday?

I'm feeling a bit under the weather today so I'm saying the heck with Word Box Wednesday this week. (Plus, I didn't really come up with anything else for the word "human". My bad.) So instead, this Wednesday is going to become Whiny Wednesday, minus the whining because I don't like to whine or complain. Instead I'm going to write about one of the rare times I got sick and it actually ended up being a deal, music wise that is.

Overall, I hate being sick. Especially the tiredness and the sore throat stuff because it impairs my ability to sing. I do a pretty good job at staying healthy but when I do get all phlegmy and sore, I get outright pissy. I can't help it. When you sing most everyday and you're not able to do it for a couple of days, or even as long as a week, it definitely sucks.

It was definitely a big deal in my Now Transmission days. As I was the lead singer it was important to keep my golden pipes in the best condition possible. I only remember canceling one show because of an illness and it had more to do with my muscle in my neck tweaking out and nothing to do with my vocal chords. I wanted to keep the streak alive when we headed to Boston for a Battle of the Bands. (Don't ask me the date or year, I'm blanking on that right now.)

It was a rare occasion that we headed to Boston for a gig but when we did it felt like the big time. Not that the shows really had that much more of a crowd than we were used to, it was just that big city feeling when you go from playing in East Nowhere, Maine to the hopping Boston metro.

This Boston gig was going to be spread over two nights. If we made it past the first round at a club called T.T. the Bears, we'd play the next night at the Middle East, a popular Cambridge club, for the finals. A couple of days before our trip I started to get a tickle in the back of my throat. This lead to plenty of coughing and eventually a good case of laryngitis, where I almost completely lost my voice. It was a similar feeling to one I had back on our very first show where I blew my voice in the middle of a set, but we don't need to talk about that.

This Battle of the Bands was a big deal for us so we decided to play the show, even though I wouldn't be singing. What we did was spontaneously switch the lineup a bit. Our bass player Jason moved to lead vocals, I went to lead guitar, and Ray, the lead guitarist went to bass. Obviously, Andy our drummer stayed behind his kit. Instead of playing our allotted two songs we rocked an unrehearsed version of our current "single" She's Not There by it's lonesome. (You can check out She's Not There on Now Transmission's Myspace.)

Jason was a great singer, I wasn't worried about this ability to rock it at the front of the stage, nor was I worried about Ray's bass skills. I was a little concerned with my skills on lead guitar. I wrote the song, so I knew how to play it, but these were the days before I strapped on a guitar to play rhythm so my on stage guitar chops were slim to none. We made it through just fine and caught a lucky break when not all the bands showed up and we got a free ride to the final round at the Middle East.

We rocked with the same configuration that night as well. We didn't win but I thought we definitely did the song justice especially considering the situation. It turned out to be a pretty fun change of pace with all of us (well, most of us) moving into another role we weren't used to but I can't even explain how frustrating it was not being able to do my true part, or even hold a conversation for that matter. I also always kind of wondered what would have happened had we been able to play two songs at full strength. I guess we'll never know.

Here's to never getting that sick again! It's the middle of the day but I think I'll down some NyQuil and hit this crap before it gets me down good so I can get some energy and get singing again. The sooner the better. Keep rockin'!

Update: I did some research to help out my terrible memory and discovered that this trip to Boston took place September 26th and 28th of 2005! Holy crap, that seems like ages ago!